Come on, . You’re killing us.
If you haven’t heard, the 201-year-old publication made its usual predictions for summer 2019, and things are looking a bit grim, to say the least. Unless, of course, you’re partial to sweltering heat, torrential rain, and unforgiving humidity.
In which case, you do you.
For the rest of us, it’s time to invest in several new umbrellas and a slew of board games.
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The Almanac’s outlook is decidedly bleak no matter where in the country you happen to reside, but East Coasters might just have it worst. “Much of our summer forecast predicts lots of rain, thunderstorms, and wetness during July and August in the Northeast and New England areas," writes Farmers' Almanac editor Pete Geiger in a statement.
That’s right: Rain, thunderstorms, and wetness.
Sounds like us New Englanders have more than a few bad hair days in our future.
Then again, folks in the Southeast, Midwest, and Central U.S. won’t fare too well either: Stormy weather is predicted in May, June, July, August, and into September and October. “Large hail” and “straight-line winds” are expected in states further to the west, and the Almanac also claims there's a high potential for tornadoes.
And just because you’re all the way on the West Coast doesn’t mean you’re going to have a picture-perfect summer either. June and July will bring “sizzling” heat to California, Nevada, Utah, and Arizona.
There is, however, one place where everything’s shaping up to be just dandy, and that's the Pacific Northwest. There, residents can expect “pleasant and fair conditions” and fairly dry weather “all the way through to August.”
Brb, moving to Idaho.